When my mom was 31 years old she had a dream. She wanted to bring the best and quickest rickroller to life. She searched through at least 420 states until she found the perfect partner to get the most advanced comedian. He might not be the best father but she was sure that he had the best sperm for the job. At the age of 2 my mom thought me how open YouTube and copy links. All my life till I was 12 I was only allowed to hear never gonna give you up, the baby shark song and despacito (so I was practically forced to hear never gonna give you up). How else do you think they got this many views. After 6 hours 28 minutes and 59.86 seconds of never gonna give you up I asked my mother while crying if I couldn’t hear Mozart and become a pianist. all she did was getting her fly swatter with Rick astley on it and hit me with it in the rythm of never gonna give you up.

Around 3 days and 5 hours later I got sent to a school designed for scammers so I could learn the art of deception. I know at least 69^69 different ways to trick you into clicking at a sam (or never gonna give you up). And look at this amazing [car](https://youtu.be/o-YBDTqX_ZU) it’s so fast and has at least 4 tyres. See? I learned things like that for 6 years in school. To this day my everyday life contains of 8 hours school where I rickroll people for better grades, 8 hours free time where I rickroll people so that my mom doesn’t get angry and 8 hours of sleep. I trained myself to write code while sleeping so now when I sleep I write an AI that rickrolls people to raise my efficiency. I even found a way to work around my nemesis (the bot that detects rickrolls) but that’s a secret I’m not allowed to share or my mom will get the taser again.

The path of my life is dark but I will never forget my big goal, rickroll every president on this world and then have a private concert where Rick astley uses a gun instead of a mic for the homophobic presidents. Maybe then my mother will allow me to other songs I wanna hear like [this one](https://youtu.be/YCVXe5ZmZrs), or [this one](https://youtu.be/o-YBDTqX_ZU), or maybe [this one](https://youtu.be/DnmWnkU20l0)